Friday, March 18, 2011

The Fashion (or lack thereof) of a Mother

Let me preface this post with the truth.  At times in my life, I did try to look good.  Here are ALL of those times:

  • A few weeks in high school.
  • My first few years of college, but only on Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights.  Basically, whenever I went out drinking.....ummm yeah.....so add some Sundays, Mondays, Tuesdays and Wednesdays. 
  • The first few weeks (okay days) of a new job.
  • The first few dates with someone new.
  • The first 4 months I dated my husband.  I actually wore dresses.
  • My Wedding (I wore a dress for this too).

Yeah that is pretty much it.  Let's state the obvious...I am LOW maintenance.  When I do my hair and put on make-up, I am almost unrecognizable.  This is not an assumption; students, bosses, boyfriends and family have all felt inclined to share this fact with me. (Notice my husband is not mentioned. :)

So let's add a toddler to the above.  Is it possible to get any "lower?"
Let me describe what I am wearing, from top to bottom. 

                                                (In my sexy voice)  

  • A black t-shirt.  On the right shoulder, a spaghetti sauce stain from making dinner (yeah I MADE dinner). On the left shoulder, a stain of unknown origin.  A few deodorant stains sprinkle down both sides (Hey, at least I remembered to put it on today).  Numerous coffee/latte/coolata stains adorn the front.  The bottom has some dried snot that originated from my daughter's nose. 
  • Grey pants.  Fortunately, my t-shirt is long enough to cover the various   toothpaste stains left after wiping my daughter's face (yes I have towels).  
  • One black and grey sock.  At least they match the outfit.
  • Hair.  I have gotten smarter in my motherhood....a pink Louis Vuitton hat.  It screams fashionista without the fuss (I brush it though....sometimes).
  • If you are wondering about my nails, eyebrows or toes, then you really aren't paying attention.
  • OH...I did remember to wear a bra today.  Winning! 

Now if I had a Nanny, hair stylist, make-up artist, clothes stylist and a personal assistant....I would look like Halle Berry too (I'm white though).

1 comment:

  1. I think we were separated at birth........lol. Sounds just like me.

    ReplyDelete